5/8/2021 0 Comments
It's surprisingly easy to hold a grudge, but if it's about a friend, coworker, or loved one, it can fill you with bitterness, keep you stuck in the past, and even cause anxiety or depression.
This means that you are the one suffering the situation, and it is not necessarily the subject of your anger and irritation.
In addition to this emotional burden, researchers from Glasgow Caledonian University and Edinburgh Napier University in Scotland found that holding a grudge can also increase feelings of physical pain , even if that pain has nothing to do with the incident in question. So if your lower back is bothering you or you are suffering from arthritis pain, such discomfort may feel worse if you keep cooking the resentment.
Letting go of resentment begins with forgiveness . That does not mean that you are validating the behavior that the other person showed, and you may never forget it, but you can forgive the person for their mistake and, in that way, free yourself from the weight that they have been generating in your life.
The benefits are vast and immediate. Making a conscious decision to let go of the anger and resentment that keep you tied to the past will allow you to focus on your present and what is important to you today.
Letting go of grudges frees you to focus on the positive relationships in your life, the ones that bring you true happiness and fulfillment. It also decreases feelings of anxiety and hostility, while improving self-esteem and overall health.
Thus, when you let go of your grudges, they will no longer define you and you will feel as if a burden has been lifted from your shoulders.
Almost all relationships will be affected by conflict at some point .
Whether with a spouse or child, co-worker or friend, there are healthy ways to address and resolve these issues, according to experts at the University of
Texas at Austin Mental Health and Counseling Center.
The differences of opinion are often at the root of the conflict . These can be about specific values, perceptions or concepts, from how to make a presentation at work to different parenting
The conflict can ruin personal relationships and business, so know how to resolve differences is an important life skill .
It starts with accepting that the other person's point of view is legitimate and being willing to discuss your differences openly and without prejudice with the goal of solving problems, not to determine a winner and a loser.
To do this, we leave you 4 keys to resolve conflicts:
Your focus is important: try to stay calm and focus on the specific problem, not other things that have been bothering you
Acknowledge your emotions, but don't let them dictate the conversation. Be aware of any negative body language you are displaying , such as avoiding eye contact, a negative facial expression, a harsh tone of voice, or an angry posture.
Think about it: folded arms don't convey an open mind . An attentive tone and use of humor can help dissipate tension as you begin to speak.
Be specific in using words to reframe the situation and honestly express your feelings without anger or other emotions. Then do the most important thing: listen to the other person's point of view and make sure you understood it by repeating it .
Together they can find a solution. It may be hard to believe when you're feeling angry, but if you approach them in a respectful way, conflict can strengthen the bond between two people.